In a Toxic Triangle? Reposition yourself!

  • Fact: In a few seconds, we can be drawn into an emotional triangle. For example: A colleague at work comes out of the boss’s office fuming and makes a beeline to your desk. “You won’t believe what just happened…”.
  • Action: How you respond in this situation will strengthen or weaken your position in the ongoing triangle between you, the boss and your colleague.
    1] Avoid feeling sorry for someone, blaming someone or offering solutions,
    2] Listen without judgement and then help your colleague clarify their thinking about what happened in the boss’s office,
    3] Avoid the “togetherness position” which means avoid commiserating or feeling responsible to help your colleague figure out how to patch things up with the boss.