Reactivity, Which We Call the Public Face of Anxiety
The resilient leader is one who has learned to watch for subtle (and sometimes not-so-subtle) signs of reactivity in her/himself, and in the organization s/he leads.
What do we mean by Reactivity
On the individual level, here are some signals of reactivity that can alert us that we are carrying an unhealthy level of anxiety: a racing mind, tension in neck and shoulders, a knot in the stomach, restless sleep or inability to sleep, or difficulty staying focused. There are myriad other ways that escalating chronic anxiety makes itself felt and known in every dimension of our lives. On the organizational level, there are similar signs of deficit or excess that can alert a leader to the need to raise urgency or dial down anxiety. We deal with these in some detail in the next chapter and also in the chapters on Triangles and Over/Underfunctioning, both of which are visible expressions of anxiety. But the point to note here is the importance of learning about reactivity, the positive, healthy kind that keeps us alive and flourishing, as well as the hyper reactivity that can do us in.
Recognizing reactivity and how it works, and being a more astute observer of the emotional system (in self, others, or an entire organization), like any other skill, can be developed over time and with practice. A guide, mentor, or coach can be helpful in pointing out what to look for, but ultimately, it is the leader’s commitment to and patience with the gradual nature of mastering this New Way of seeing that are required to develop proficiency in this key leadership competency.
Getting On the Balcony
One of the most powerful practices we know of that can help us develop this skill is called “getting on the balcony” (an image popularized by Ronald Heifetz in his book Leadership on the Line). The image is that of a crowded ballroom full of dancers, with a balcony at one end. As you are dancing with your partner, you mentally put yourself up on the balcony and observe how you are interacting with him/her. But from the balcony, you can observe not only yourself but also how your partner and others in the room are dancing. Finally, from that same vantage point, you can simultaneously follow the overall movement and flow of all of the dancers in the room as they sway and move to the rhythm and beat of the music.
In the context of the Resilient Leadership model, to “get on the balcony” means to observe the emotional system by observing the flow of reactive, instinctual, automatic functioning, in yourself, in others, and in the system at large. As you develop some level of proficiency in this skill, you will be able to observe with a more detached curiosity, which will immediately lower your reactivity and make you more thoughtful. A mind-set of curiosity always makes a person more thoughtful and, as a consequence, less reactive. As a practice that can help you manage your chronic anxiety more skillfully, getting on the balcony is as good as it gets.
Applications:
- Chronic anxiety is an “abiding state of unease in the face of imagined or anticipated threats.” What imagined or anticipated threats (e.g., threats to your safety or that of your loved ones, security in your position at work, etc.) might be fueling your current level of chronic anxiety?
- Our bodies often reveal the presence of chronic anxiety before we are consciously aware of it. How does chronic anxiety manifest itself in your body — for example, a knot in your stomach, clenched jaw, or tension in neck or shoulders?
Do you want more information about managing reactivity in yourself and in others?
Watch this video: https://www.resilientleadershipdevelopment.com/jim-burns-on-reactivity/
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