- Fact: Both overfunctioning and underfunctioning are reciprocal phenomena. That means you can’t have one without the other. Whenever you are overfunctioning, that pattern is connected to underfunctioning somewhere else in the system. This is one of the “iron laws” of emotional systems, even when the connection is difficult or nearly impossible to spot.
- Action: Think systems, and trust that if you stop your part in this reciprocal seesaw, the other(s) will eventually course-correct and move towards a more balanced pattern. Anticipate initial push-back as you adjust your behaviors. But if you persist in your commitment to a more balanced way of functioning, in the end the other(s) will adjust their functioning as well
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