Certified Leadership Training, Coaching and Consulting for Organizations
Feeling Overwhelmed? Stay Calm, Stay the Course, Stay Connected

Feeling Overwhelmed by Change?

A well-informed leader adeptly navigates change with thoughtfulness, minimizing resistance fueled by anxiety, and ensures a smoothly communicated transition.

Practice of the Month

Feeling Overwhelmed? Stay Calm, Stay the Course, Stay Connected

Feeling Overwhelmed by Change?

STAY CALM, STAY THE COURSE, STAY CONNECTED

Change is a fascinating phenomenon. While some leaders eagerly embrace it, others fear it or are at best, reluctant champions. Take, for instance, the upcoming solar eclipse that is capturing the attention of people across the United States. While many view an eclipse as a remarkable celestial event, not all shared the same enthusiasm. For example, some religious sects promote the idea that a solar eclipse is a warning from God about colossal changes leading to the doom of civilization. Same event-different interpretations. What is the lesson for leaders?

A well-informed leader adeptly navigates change with thoughtfulness, minimizing resistance fueled by anxiety, and ensures a smoothly communicated transition.

How is this done?

  1. First, maintain a less anxious presence. Leadership is primarily an emotional process. Before “doing” (see below), it’s important for you to work on your “being.” Your level of inner calm and self-command sets the tone. To achieve inner calm, some leaders choose exercise, while others choose meditation, prayer, or reflective reading and journaling. This essential first step communicates calm, increasing the effectiveness of the steps below.
  2. Clarify what remains unchanged. Amidst the excitement of the eclipse, many people were certain of the constants in their lives. Sunrise, sunset, and gravity weren’t changing. Similarly, as a leader, in the midst of change, communicate to your team that your organization’s core mission remains steadfast. What's evolving is the approach to fulfilling your mission-driven values in an ever-changing world.
  3. Foster open dialogue about the change. Recognize that change can evoke uncertainty and fear. Engage your team in repeated and frequent fact-based conversations that address both known and unknown aspects of the transition. Maintaining open lines of communication ensures clarity and helps ease the anxiety during the process. Communicate over and over to forestall rumors and reaffirm facts.
  4. Acknowledge the sense of loss associated with change. Understand that for many, change signifies leaving behind the familiar. As a leader, demonstrate empathy by actively listening to your people's concerns. Bridge the gap between the old and new by prioritizing genuine connection over the speed of implementation.

In today's rapidly changing world, adaptability is essential for leaders to remain relevant. Effective communication of guiding principles, coupled with meaningful engagement with your team, can mitigate skepticism and resistance. Embrace the inevitability of change, anticipate challenges, and navigate the transition by staying the course, staying calm during the transition, and staying connected to your people.

John Moyer

RL Trainer John Moyer contributed to this article. As a 30+ year veteran of education, John has trained and coached both student and adult leaders.  Through his work primarily in education, John has helped leaders of all ages discover that leadership is influence- which starts with the leader becoming a less anxious presence. You can reach John at: johnm@resilientleadershipdevelopment.com.

The RL Coach Certification Program

The RL Coach Certification virtual training program is designed to encourage attendees to explore new perspectives in their own professional and personal development. This is accomplished during the 18½ hour training that includes input from subject matter experts and peer sharing around practical application of the RL principles being presented. Participants who complete the full program earn 38 ICF Core Credits and 2 Resource Development Credits. Note: Completion of the RL Coach Certification Program fulfills the ICF annual professional development 40 credit requirement.

Curiosity Comes in Handy

Curiosity Comes in Handy

When encountering difficulties at work, our automatic response typically involves judgment and action. This response is unsurprising…

Practice of the Month

Curiosity Comes in Handy

Curiosity Comes in Handy

Some of you may remember Hands Across America, a fundraising effort aimed at combating world poverty. It began on Memorial Day 1986 with the ambitious goal of forming a continuous human chain across America, with each participant donating $10 to the cause. While the fundraising goal and the aim for a continuous line fell short, millions participated, and millions of dollars were raised for this noble cause.

In their upcoming book, “Resilient Leadership 2.0 - Revised and Expanded Edition,” Bob Duggan and Bridgette Theurer dedicate an entire chapter to one topic: curiosity. The authors urge readers to consider their hands—a body part we seldom contemplate. Taking the time to be curious about the design and capabilities of one part of the human body can be insightful. This curious mindset can also be valuable when facing workplace challenges.

When encountering difficulties at work, our automatic response typically involves judgment and action. This response is unsurprising, as it’s ingrained in our evolutionary wiring. For instance, when a baby deer spots a coyote, it doesn’t adopt a curious mindset—that could be dangerous and be lunch for the coyote! Instead, the deer instinctively flees for survival. However, this “fight or flight” mindset rarely serves leaders well in the workplace.

In professional settings, when we encounter a difficult colleague or anticipate a tedious meeting, we often make instant judgments. Yet, heeding our brain’s warning of “Danger!” doesn’t benefit us or those we lead.

Instead, let’s embrace a more curious mindset—one designed to challenge our assumptions. Swapping the mindset of “The Judge” for “The Investigator,” we can pose questions like:

  • “How can I better understand my colleague?”
  • “During meetings, what do I observe in myself when others are speaking?”
  • “What action can I take right now to view this interaction or meeting as a gift and an opportunity?”

Adopting a curious mindset helps us alleviate stress, respond more effectively to people and circumstances, and ultimately cultivate more innovative teams.

John Moyer

RL Trainer, John Moyer contributed to this article. As a 30+ year veteran of education, John has trained and coached both student and adult leaders.  Through his work primarily in education, John has helped leaders of all ages discover that leadership is influence- which starts with the leader becoming a less anxious presence. You can reach John at: johnm@resilientleadershipdevelopment.com.

Learn More About the RL Coach Certification Program

The RL Coach Certification virtual training program is designed to encourage attendees to explore new perspectives in their own professional and personal development. This is accomplished during the 18½ hour training that includes input from subject matter experts and peer sharing around practical application of the RL principles being presented. Participants who complete the full program earn 38 ICF Core Credits and 2 Resource Development Credits. Note: Completion of the RL Coach Certification Program fulfills the ICF annual professional development 40 credit requirement.

On the RL Balcony

On The 2024 RL Balcony

Another year filled with many opportunities to exercise leadership—for ourselves and others—every one of the 366 days in 2024.

Practice of the Month

On the RL Balcony

On the RL 2024 Balcony

Hello 2024! We begin another year filled with many wonderful opportunities to exercise leadership—for ourselves and for others—each and every one of the 366 days in 2024. (Every leap year gives us a bonus day to practice Resilient Leadership!)

Our framework of thought will define how we respond to these opportunities. We can be influenced by (and sometimes driven by) our instincts and emotions; we can also bring a thoughtful, curious mindset to situations and exchanges with people who trigger our “automatic” reactions. How we choose to respond will determine if we promote greater calm or escalate anxiety, whether we operate out of a scarcity mentality or an attitude of abundance and generosity, if our lives are filled with joyfulness or bitterness, and—ultimately—if our leadership brings more clarity or sows confusion.

By our thoughtful action or our automatic reaction, we are always making a choice. This year, let’s resolve to be deliberate, thoughtful, and brave. Let’s lead with greater Calm, Clarity, and Conviction.

3 Resilient Leadership Strategies for Navigating Disruptive Change

3 Resilient Leadership Strategies for Navigating Disruptive Change

VUCA affects our workplace, our relationships, and even our expectations for the future. Every day, we encounter a VUCA state of unease.

Practice of the Month

3 Resilient Leadership Strategies for Navigating Disruptive Change

3 Resilient Leadership Strategies for Navigating Disruptive Change

Disruptive and unrelenting change is here to stay. Every day, we encounter a VUCA (volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous) state of unease. VUCA affects our workplace, our relationships, and even our expectations for the future. In the face of such change, it’s helpful to adopt behaviors that won’t necessarily slow down the pace of VUCA challenges but will enable us to manage ourselves more successfully.

Let’s explore three concepts that will help us manage VUCA change.

  1. Self-Awareness: We define chronic anxiety as “an abiding sense of unease about imagined or anticipated threats.” This unease is often manifested physically as tension or worry (anxiety.) You can feel it, but you can’t see it. The first step in managing chronic anxiety is to increase objective self-awareness. The Action: Pause, even briefly, and ask, “What is my part in this?” This question allows you to consider better options, to make better, more thoughtful choices.
  2. Self-Regulation:  Self-Regulation grows with managing one’s own self, with controlling self, with becoming a more responsible person, and permitting others to be themselves. To work on yourself means to work on understanding how you’re behaving in your emotional system and the relationships you’re in both at work and at home. A self-regulated person is able to balance how they think (rationally) with how they feel (emotionally.) This balanced thinking is not reactive, it is objective and allows us to make the best choice our emotional, rational brains, working together can make. This balance is critical to navigating disruptive change.
  3. Self-Definition  Building Self-Awareness and Self-Regulation empowers you to make informed choices. Working on self involves understanding your behaviors within your emotional system and striving to be a more responsible person. Making choices that help you define yourself will help improve your relationships and your life experiences in general.

The Journey: Stay calm, Stay Connected, and Stay the Course by working on balanced thinking and consciously making informed choices when navigating disruptive change. As we make better-balanced choices in our daily lives, the less impact VUCA will have on us.

Turtles

Don’t Steal the Struggle

“Whew life starts out so hard!” I asked her if they ever helped these turtles during this first part of their life.

Practice of the Month

Turtles

Don’t Steal the Struggle

I recently had the opportunity to spend a week at Pawley’s Island, one of my favorite beaches, with some very good friends. It was restorative in so many ways, watching the sun rise with my morning coffee, long walks on the beach and a wonderful Low Country Boil with freshly caught blue shelled crabs!

One of the highlights of this trip happened unexpectedly while sipping my coffee on the dock, I noticed a group of people huddled together on the beach near the dunes. It looked like a class of some sort and as I watched, I realized that the group were actually part of the volunteers who carefully guard the sea turtle nests and their migration to the ocean. They were watching a nest of sea turtles hatch and emerge from deep in the sand to begin their trek to the ocean! This usually happens only at night!!

I quickly joined the group as these tiny creatures pulled themselves out of the deep sand and started the long hike to the ocean. The tide was low and the ocean a very long way from the dunes, especially for these little guys. I latched on a few of them and accompanied them on their journey. As I watched them, I found myself feeling anxious as they encountered one hurtle after another on their way.  There were footprints from morning walkers filled with water that one of the turtles fell in and flipped over desperately flailing his legs to recover and crawl out of the hole. Another little guy fell into a crab hole and disappeared for a few minutes. When he began to surface it seemed like a never-ending task to get out and resume the journey. He even started walking the wrong way!!

Each time I watched the turtles face these obstacles, my anxiety increased and I felt the urge to intervene and help them on their way! I mean couldn’t I just pick them up and take them to the ocean and set them on their way? Then as they finally reached the ocean, the waves kept batting them around - out under and back to the beach, flipping them over and over again several time before they finally disappeared into the ocean.

I turned to one of the volunteers and said – “Whew life starts out so hard!” I asked her if they ever helped these turtles during this first part of their life.  She look at me and said “oh no. This part of the journey seems hard but is necessary as they face the bigger challenges ahead.”

Oh – so very true. As I reflected, I was reminded of one of the Resilient Leadership principles: the importance or developing our internal muscle – the one that allows us to be able to stand with people as they face life’s struggles and not rob them of the opportunity to learn and grow through tough circumstances. I thought of the many times that my anxiety got in the way as I watched a person struggle in life. I was also reminded that it has been during my most painful struggles that I learned  and grew the most.

Let’s us remember - as a very wise colleague of mine said – “Don’t steal the struggle” of others due to our own anxiety.
Tip: When presented with a situation where a person is struggling with a personal or professional situation:
Hit the pause button – Take a breath, step back/get on the balcony and get curious.

  • What is really going on here?
  • What is my part in this situation?
  • What is the right thing to do at this moment?

A calm thoughtful mind will allow you to know what the situation calls for.

Resilient Leadership Trainer, Marjorie Shonnard, contributed to this article.
Marge Shonnard

For 25 years, Marge has served several organizations in a variety of executive leadership roles. Her work experience, combines her background in teaching, coaching and training to offer leaders at all levels of the organization the opportunity to deepen their understanding of themselves by discovering their strengths and experiential wisdom, and thus to bring their “best self” to every situation.

Contact Marge at: marges@resilientleadershipdevelopment.com

Join our RL Webinar Series currently underway.

Learn more about how to See, Think, and Lead, especially in anxious times:

POTM

VUCA + P

More and more, we add to VUCA the reality of Polarization—a sad but expanding spread of extremism —a divisive way of thinking and acting.

Practice of the Month

POTM

VUCA + P

The Resilient Leadership Team has made frequent use of the VUCA acronym during our Leadership Development Trainings and Coaching work.

Virtually every leader we work with recognizes that ours is a world marked by Volatility, Uncertainty, Complexity, and Ambiguity. More and more, we add to these four characteristics the reality of Polarization—a sad but expanding spread of extremism —a way of thinking and acting that divides individuals and groups into separate camps that stake out positions that are polar opposites from one another.

There is no allowance for a middle ground or for neutral positions that favor “both-and” rather than “either-or”.

Writing this essay in the first week of November, it is virtually impossible to escape feeling the pressure to be drawn into this VUCA + P world. Within the space of weeks, the recent conflict in the Middle East between Hamas and Israel may have escalated into a massive regional war involving global superpowers. Within the next month, domestic political conflicts in the United States may result in a financial meltdown whose repercussions are literally global in scope. Extreme weather events this winter may fuel an intensifying debate over climate change—is it real, and if so, what are its human contributions, and what urgent actions are required to slow humankind’s inexorable march toward global catastrophe? Or… are we in a panic over “natural” climate patterns whose fluctuations over millennia represent a mere ebb and flow that needs to be managed but does not call for any urgent action?

In the face of these and many other destabilizing phenomena, the Resilient Leadership model recognizes how great the impact of increasing levels of anxiety felt by individuals and by organizations of every scale—from nuclear families to the global family of nations. And as anxiety escalates, so does our tendency towards reactivity rather than thoughtfulness. In the world of neuroscience and its many popular applications to the workplace or psychotherapy, the term “amygdala hijack” describes how easily our feeling brain can override our thinking brain, with counter-productive and even tragic results.

In such troubled times, how can we be resilient leaders—at work, with friends and neighbors, at home, and in the sphere of individual self-care?

Our first impulse, when threatened, is to react. Our primitive brain shouts at us: “For heaven’s sake, DO SOMETHING!”

But our thinking brain urges caution and offers guidance. The Resilient Leadership model provides a framework for calm, clarity, and courage in the face of what can feel like a barrage of lethal threats. It reminds us that some comments and actions during times like these must be avoided. For example, to maintain our balance and our leadership effectiveness, we cannot:

  • Withdraw in the face of high anxiety.
  • Tell others how they should feel and what they should think or do, especially when tempted to provide our unsolicited opinion.
  • Seek only information that supports our current viewpoint.
  • Focus exclusively on advocacy for our own beliefs while ignoring the views of others.
  • Adopt an “us versus them” or “good versus bad” perspective that overly simplifies the complexity of hot-button issues.

Such behaviors are examples of reactive choices. And we always have a choice. Reactive responses to emotionally charged issues are common but not inevitable. There are better options. Whenever we are faced with a difficult, complex, emotion-laden issue, taking a pause for a deep breath (or two) can provide the space for thoughtfulness to override the amygdala hijack.

These are the kinds of practical suggestions that can help us respond in a more thoughtful way.

  • Ask if there is a way to reframe what we are seeing or thinking - to replace strident judgment with genuine curiosity.
  • Stay connected to those whose different perspectives may feel threatening, ignorant, or even deliberately evil.
  • Listen to everyone’s story. Their experience has informed their perspective, and working to understand their experience at a deeper level may yield new insights and a better appreciation of their viewpoint.
  • Share what you believe - and what you are unsure of - in a calm and thoughtful manner, allowing space for vulnerability.
  • Embrace your own fallibility. It can open the door to true humility and make new, breakthrough learnings possible.
  • Stay Calm. Stay Informed. Stay Curious. Stay Connected. Stay Thoughtful.

Resilient Leadership Founder Bob Duggan and Resilient Leadership Trainers Mike Nowland and John Moyer contributed to this article.

Learn more about how to See, Think, and Lead, especially in anxious times:

Join our RL Webinar Series currently underway.

Exercise Your Leadership Muscles

Our contribution to the world is diminished by our lack of connection. The longer we stay apart, the harder it will be to reconnect.

Practice of the Month

Muscles

Exercise Your Leadership Muscles

“A leader is only able to exert positive influence on a system to which s/he is connected.”
Resilient Leadership 2.0

Absence may make our hearts grow fonder, but for sure, it makes our leadership grow weaker. Successful leaders stay connected to all members of their team, especially those who prove to be the most difficult.

A Few Thoughts: The people we are avoiding know it. Their comfort level (anxiety) is impacted by our absences. Some of their energy is tied up in wondering why they feel “outed”. Our influence and contribution to their world is diminished by our lack of connection. The longer we stay apart, the harder it will be to reconnect.

We should ask ourselves:

  • Who are we avoiding?
  • What is the impact on them?
  • On others?
  • On us?

Remember: Leaders make the first move. Strong leaders make the first move as soon as possible.

Our first impulse, when threatened, is to react. Our primitive brain shouts at us: “For heaven’s sake, DO SOMETHING!”

But our thinking brain urges caution and offers guidance. The Resilient Leadership model provides a framework for calm, clarity, and courage in the face of what can feel like a barrage of lethal threats. It reminds us that some comments and actions during times like these must be avoided. For example, to maintain our balance and our leadership effectiveness, we cannot:

  • Withdraw in the face of high anxiety.
  • Tell others how they should feel and what they should think or do, especially when tempted to provide our unsolicited opinion.
  • Seek only information that supports our current viewpoint.
  • Focus exclusively on advocacy for our own beliefs while ignoring the views of others.
  • Adopt an “us versus them” or “good versus bad” perspective that overly simplifies the complexity of hot-button issues.

Such behaviors are examples of reactive choices. And we always have a choice. Reactive responses to emotionally charged issues are common but not inevitable. There are better options. Whenever we are faced with a difficult, complex, emotion-laden issue, taking a pause for a deep breath (or two) can provide the space for thoughtfulness to override the amygdala hijack.

These are the kinds of practical suggestions that can help us respond in a more thoughtful way.

  • Ask if there is a way to reframe what we are seeing or thinking - to replace strident judgment with genuine curiosity.
  • Stay connected to those whose different perspectives may feel threatening, ignorant, or even deliberately evil.
  • Listen to everyone’s story. Their experience has informed their perspective, and working to understand their experience at a deeper level may yield new insights and a better appreciation of their viewpoint.
  • Share what you believe - and what you are unsure of - in a calm and thoughtful manner, allowing space for vulnerability.
  • Embrace your own fallibility. It can open the door to true humility and make new, breakthrough learnings possible.
  • Stay Calm. Stay Informed. Stay Curious. Stay Connected. Stay Thoughtful.

Resilient Leadership Founder Bob Duggan and Resilient Leadership Trainers Mike Nowland and John Moyer contributed to this article.

Learn more about how to See, Think, and Lead, especially in anxious times:

Join our RL Webinar Series currently underway.

Reasoned Choice (POTM)

We Need To Calm Down To Find Our Reasoned Choice

A basic concept of the ancient philosophy of Stoicism is captured in the idea of Reasoned Choice. A quote from the Greek philosopher Epictetus sheds light on the meaning of Reasoned Choice.

Practice of the Month

Reasoned Choice (POTM)

We Need To Calm Down
To Find Our Reasoned Choice

A basic concept of the ancient philosophy of Stoicism is captured in the idea of Reasoned Choice. A quote from the Greek philosopher Epictetus sheds light on the meaning of Reasoned Choice.

“If a person gave away your body to some passerby, you’d be furious. Yet you hand over your mind to anyone who comes along, so they may abuse you, leaving it disturbed and troubled—have you no shame in that?”
—EPICTETUS, ENCHIRIDION, 28

We “hand over our mind,” so to speak, in tension-filled situations by allowing ourselves to be triggered into a reactive response, which is never a Reasoned Choice. This is often followed by our own personal justification: we proclaim someone else or something else to be the cause of our reactive response.

Sorry for my outburst with our colleague. I just lost it when he declared climate change is not caused by Greenhouse gas emissions at all but is only a natural occurrence. He is just ignorant.

Our Reasoned Choice is always available. Where is it found? In our thinking self.

Every action and reaction we have is a blend of what we think and how we feel in the moment. When we think a situation or topic of conversation is safe or right-minded, we are more open and engaged. When we feel threatened or irritated by a situation or topic of conversation, even in subtle ways, we instinctively shift into classic defensive modes. We argue, get up and walk out or sit silently to protect ourselves. And the stronger our feelings of being threatened or coerced, the more likely our emotional self will overwhelm us as we lose contact with our thinking self and any hope of a Reasoned Choice.

What to do?

  • (See) Privately Examine Your State of Mind: Am I able to engage thoughtfully? Or am I in a state of extreme anxiety/anger? Then decide: Engage or not?
  • (Think) If you decide to engage, do so with a dialogue of inquiry. For example:
    • What are the facts here, and what assumptions are we, or am I making?
    • What can I offer to this exchange that will honor my views and beliefs?
    • Am I being open, honest and staying connected in my words and actions?
  • (Lead) Guide your interactions more thoughtfully and less emotionally. This calm, centered approach will not only help you but also demonstrate to others how to live a life of Reasoned Choice more consistently.

Learn more about how to See, Think, and Lead, especially in anxious times:

Join our RL Webinar Series currently underway.

Mike Nowland

Mike Nowland is a persuasive and empathetic communicator with over 30 years of senior-level experience in Leadership Development and Human Resources with companies like Marriott International, ResMed, and Kisco Senior Living.

John Moyer

John Moyer has 30+ years of experience training and coaching both student and adult leaders. His focus is primarily on individual coaching along with targeted training engagements as a complement to his teaching career.

What-is-My-Role-in-This

What is my role in this?

Being curious allows you to ask, “What is at the root of what is going on here?” and “What is my role in this?”

Practice of the Month

What-is-My-Role-in-This

What is My Role in This?

Being curious allows you to ask, “What is at the root of what is going on here?” and “What is my role in this?”

Stan Learns About Resilient Leadership.

In our June Practice of the Month, we revisited Stan and learned a bit more about the Four Ds. The Four Ds refer to four techniques people often use to deal with their anxiety. They are Displace, Distract, Dissolve, and Deploy.

Stan was recently promoted to a new job and is now heading up a new team at his place of employment. In addition, he now reports to a new supervisor who replaced his former long-time “old buddy” boss. With so much change in his work life, his level of apprehension about his future has gone way up. Chronic anxiety has caught Stan’s attention.

We described the first two Ds as unhealthy choices Stan made as he tried to Displace or Distract himself to manage his discomfort. The first behavior seeks to Displace anxiety, and it includes gossip. He has since learned that gossiping about others whom he, at first, thought were the cause of his anxiety is damaging to himself and others. Stan now realizes that gossiping simply creates more problems.

The second behavior is to Distract oneself from anxiety. Stan is learning to recognize the times he tried to relieve his chronic anxiety through procrastination, overindulgence in food, alcohol, or excessive television. These behaviors to Distract oneself from chronic anxiety proved to be unhealthy as well.

As Stan continues to learn that attempting to Displace or Distract chronic anxiety are not the best options, he’s beginning to choose behaviors that are healthier. Behaviors that Dissolve or Deploy chronic anxiety work more effectively. He’s making small changes over time, realizing that trying a lot of changes all at once will increase his chronic anxiety!

Dissolve: Exercise, meditation, and reading quality literature fall into the Dissolve category of actions. Stan and his spouse already go on evening walks with the dog, and he’s had a routine of reading before bed to unwind. Recently, Stan has taken up meditation. Because family mornings can be hectic, Stan has begun getting up 20 minutes before the family wakes up. He may be getting up earlier than he used to, but the feeling of well-being that meditation has brought him is so rewarding he understands its benefit to him. The meditation app Stan uses has taught him to pause a few seconds when anxious at work and at home to calm himself by being mindful. Stan starts by taking slow, deep breaths. Next, he’s learning to think about his thinking. He is learning to observe his thoughts for what they are – just thoughts, not hard facts. No judgment, no criticism; not “I’m angry” or “I’m happy” because Stan knows he is not his thoughts. By observing these thoughts or emotions as “oh, anger” or “oh, joy,” he can now choose to respond in a way that makes him and the people around him feel more at ease and more connected.

Deploy: How good are you at facing a perceived threat with calm? Some of us will immediately say, “Not great.” Stan would agree. Having an open and curious mindset in the face of a perceived threat allows new pathways to emerge as alternatives to simply reacting to every perceived challenge. With a curious mind, Stan can ask himself, “Is this actually a threat at all?” Many times, after learning to calmly observe a situation, the answer is “Not really”. Stan is learning how not to be reactive to challenging situations as he deploys a new mindset.

Wrapping it Up. Most neuroscientists would agree that 95 – 99 percent of our day-to-day behavior is unconscious and instinctual, and/or habitual. When we allow our racing minds to perceive circumstances as threats, of course, we’re anxious. In addition to meditation, how do we calm our racing minds? One suggestion is detached curiosity. Instead of unconsciously reacting to each situation, be intentional in your curiosity. Focus on facts; what is known and what is unknown? Avoid speculating about causes or motives. Do not make assumptions.

Being curious allows you to ask, “What is at the root of what is going on here?” and “What is my role in this?”

These questions allow us to develop a calm, curious mindset. Over time our thoughtful, less reactive mindset allows us to become a Less Anxious Presence. This is when one is truly able to “Stay Calm, Stay the Course, and Stay Connected!”

We explore these principles and behaviors in our Resilient Leadership courses. The concept of calming yourself is what we call Six-Second Centering. Learning how to “see” the Emotional System leads to looking at the root causes of anxiety and asking, “What is my role in this?” When we understand our role in lowering chronic anxiety, we avoid behaviors that attempt to Displace or Distract anxiety, and we can then choose healthy behaviors that Dissolve and Deploy it. As we learn to develop mindfulness and think about our thoughts, we can choose to practice a detached curiosity. Our calm demeanor and curious, non-reactive mindset convey a Less Anxious Presence to those we meet.

Come join Stan and the rest of us who are learning to Stay Calm, Stay the Course, and Stay Connected with Resilient Leadership!

Mike Nowland

Mike Nowland is a persuasive and empathetic communicator with over 30 years of senior-level experience in Leadership Development and Human Resources with companies like Marriott International, ResMed, and Kisco Senior Living.

John Moyer

John Moyer has 30+ years of experience training and coaching both student and adult leaders. His focus is primarily on individual coaching along with targeted training engagements as a complement to his teaching career.

Unleash Your Leadership Power with our Webinar Series

  • Dig into our overview of 6 key concepts of Resilient Leadership in our upcoming Webinar Series
  • Join us on our leadership pathway to develop and learn how to lead others and your team more effectively. See, Think, and Lead Differently.
  • Sign up up now for our July 12 Webinar
In-toxic-work-environments

Toxicity in the Workplace: A Conversation We Need to Have

In toxic work environments, employees experience high levels of stress, communication is limited, blame becomes the norm, and harmful attitudes and actions are rewarded.

Toxicity in the Workplace:
A Conversation We Need to Have

Many leaders often find themselves in situations where they lack the necessary tools, skills, and experience to effectively guide their team.

In-toxic-work-environments

While challenges are a natural part of work, some environments foster a toxic culture characterized by negative and bullying behaviors. In toxic work environments, employees experience high-stress levels, limited communication, blame becomes the norm, and harmful attitudes and actions are rewarded.

Resilient Leadership offers a solution for leaders seeking to understand and navigate these toxic environments. Our program equips leaders with the knowledge to recognize such environments and reflect on their own contributions. By developing a deeper understanding, leaders learn to see, think, and lead more effectively. If you're interested in taking the first step, join one of our upcoming webinars starting in July. Led by experienced, Resilient Leaders, who have been in your shoes, each webinar costs $25 and requires just one hour of your time.

Start your journey towards effectively leading yourself and others through challenging toxic situations.

During each webinar, we present the basic concept for one of six Resilient Leadership dimensions and share useful techniques for managing individuals and teams, which can be put into practice. Each webinar's last 10-15 minutes is set aside to answer questions about Resilient Leadership and/or the day's topic. A free follow-up call is available for those who want to know more about Resilient Leadership.

The Resilient Leadership series offers new insights into the cause and impact of actions, interactions, and reactions within emotional systems, especially when anxiety is high.

  • Unit 1: New Way of Seeing (Intro to RL)
  • Unit 2: Be a Step-Down Transformer (Less Anxious Presence)
  • Unit 3: Stay Connected
  • Unit 4: Lead with Conviction
  • Unit 5: Balance the See-saw (Over/Under Functioning)
  • Unit 6: Managing Triangles
Get the Recordings